I really wish I could figure it out. I'm good looking, charming, and even intellectual. Why couldn't I get laid tonight? I went to door guy, but was turned away. Was it the fact that McSpic was up my ass all night? Was it that I took the law student's phone number? Was it that I allowed the boys play? Whatever the reason, he said no. FUCK! Not really.
I overheard him give his two weeks notice. I guess he really is moving on.
All of these thoughts running through my head, it's like a whirl pool in my mind. I know I've slept around too much lately and it's hard to hold my head up these days. I'm done. I'm out. I just have to make it clear. I just have to suck it up until May 3rd. I'm counting the days. It's not fair to the guys in my life, but in reality it's what's best for me.
It's so bad I contemplate go back to the pole for some healing. But that's just it. I'm not 26 any more and looking for someone to validate me. I know I'm a good woman and maybe someday I might meet a nice guy AND be ready for it.
Once more FUCK!
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