Where the day takes you....

And yes this includes getting duped towards the end of the day. Boat boy proves to be more and more interesting with each encounter. But before we go there, I spent the day with my mother.

I told my mother about the figure modeling I'd done. She asked if it was nude to which I answered honestly. She was proud that I could do it, and validated my decision to work with an artist. Hey, it would be my luck my mother or someone she knows stumbles across a pic of me.

There was that moment in my relationship where my mother became my friend, but still my mother, and I don't think either one of us has looked back. Neither one of us is perfect, yet we accept each other. Some of the highlights included a blazer I found at Good Will. My mother kindly offered to sow in shoulder pads for me. I explained (as I always do on our shopping adventures) that the 80s are over, and please get unstuck. I am the evil little shit that would hide all her shoulder pads if given the chance, but she won't let me know where she keeps them, except in every single top she owns. Oh, well. I did tell her though if I decided to go as an 80s version of Madonna then I'd let her go to town. We laughed.

Another random topic was men. This is always a fun subject because as we grow older our tastes seem to parallel each other more and more. Now mind you my poor mother had to listen to my verbal diarrhea about Boat Boy, but in between we mentioned how many men have gone to great lengths to impress me. I do not mean to seem bored by these gestures, just unimpressed. As I explained to my mother I get really frustrated that a man will go to great lengths to impress me without every bothering to get to know what really matters to me. My mother explained to me that is the lament of being a beautiful woman. Then she stated that she didn't know what that was like.

My immediate answer was "Bullshit!" (Side note: being an adult around your parent does not necessarily entitle you to swear, but considering it does allow you to be more honest then my mother is not at all surprised by this reaction from me). I then go over her dating history starting with my old man. I also had to tell her I was so grateful she had not remarried because at 33, I still don't think I'm ready for a step father. Her response was,"To hell with whether or not you're ready, I'm not ready!" Again a good full on belly laugh ensued.

Lastly there was a moment in Bath and Body works. I love going there with my mom because we get to rate the fragrances. I'm a "Warm Vanilla Sugar" girl, but venture out into other areas. We had fun smelling new things and making funny faces and noises to the things we didn't like. There came a moment when I showed her the body sugar for exfoliating. I explain how it works wonders on the skin and you come out as smooth as a baby's bottom. She responded, "I'm suddenly seeing you doing your figure modeling. What can I say? I'm still stuck in the 80s."

As these laughs passed between us, I couldn't help but wonder about Boat Boy and his father's recent passing. It made me sad that he could no longer have those very special moments with his parent the way I was having mine today with my mom. It made me cherish it all that much more.

Around 2:30 Boat boy appears on the radar via a text message. I respond that I'm spending time with my mom and that I'd call when I was done. He informs me it's Monday night football and therefore guy's night, but wanted to know if I'd like to come over before hand.

Hmmmm..... let me think about this for a minute.... Fuck yeah. I'd love to fuck around before I have to go to work and you go hang out with your buddies. So, after departing from my mother's company I truck my way over to his place.

Upon my arrival, I am informed that he is hosting Monday night football, and asks me to help him clean. Okay, but you have to fuck me when you're done. I clean, but I also cuss.....


"God damned mother fucking son of a bitch. How the fuck did I get suckered into this bullshit? This is girlfriend crap right here, and I AM NOT YOUR FUCKING GIRLFRIEND!!!!!" You fucking asshole. Jesus Christ. Fucking bullshit."

I stop. I laugh. I ask for permission to say something funny, yet inappropriate. He's suprised but signs off. I tell him I'm grateful such-and-such nickname is already taken. He mentions I could be "Beer Whore". I told him, "No, that would imply I drink all your beer, but I don't"

I finish tidying up the kitchen and cleaning the bathroom. We fuck. Rounds one and two. We talk. He gets a text for dinner, and I have to go.

Post codial cuddling is very important to me. It validates that I am not just some piece of ass, but rather a valued individual. I felt tossed out tonight, and I'm letting it slide.

I envisioned him at guys night tonight with (hopefully) the internal thoughts of "This is great! I'm fucking a hot red head. She cleans my apartment, and I bet I can get her to do my laundry, and I don't even have to call her my girlfriend. I'm one lucky mother fucker."

Why, yes Boat Boy. You are, and I am one dumb horny bitch.