Tuesday, December 15, 2009

The bond of friendship

SD has been amazing since day one. Literally, day one. I remember looking him in the eye through the chaos of the moment. It very easily may have been love at first sight.

Years later, thing have changed. He is still the only man I can trust with my full on crazy. He navigates so well. And in those intense moments of irrational thought, he can reach in and pull me out of my spiral.

Of late there has been a great deal of that on my end with Boat Boy. I am most likely mind fucking myself out of a good thing and yet at the same time feel that I am a low priority for him.

SD has been the light that time and again has pulled me out of my darkness. However, the tables have turned.

In discussing our psuedo relationships that titter a fine line between being significant and meaningless, he shares how he's hesitant to get involved with someone, but most likely will anyway.

We have been each others' support system in feeding our cynical romantic side, but today I believe his died with this text message.

" Every time I extend myself a little reality comes crashing down. If I ever tell you not to be numb, disregard. It's too hard. It's not worth it to let people in. They will disappoint every time."

Know that my heart bleeds for you. Allow me to be there for you the way you have been there for me through these past few years.

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